Published 08.08.08 in Metro
What's new, Pussycat?
Though Quentin Tarantino is known for revitalizing the careers of pop has-beens, this might be too much of a stretch for him. Rumors started circulating recently that he had found the perfect star for a supposedly planned remake of “Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!” The star? Britney Spears.
Alas, Britney playing the role, supposedly a “killer lesbian,” is not to be. Her rep rushed right over to “Access Hollywood” to set the record straight: “Right now she’s concentrating on recording a new album.” Wait, Britney can concentrate?
Of course, this was probably all a great big misunderstanding. Tarantino already did a “Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!” remake. Only it was called “Death Proof.” As for the Britney casting rumor, someone probably just overheard him saying, “She’d make a killer lesbian” at a party or something. It’s an honest mistake.
Statue of limitations
The town of Ovieto, Spain, has erected a statue commemorating one of its heroes: Woody Allen.
No, seriously. And no one is more baffled by this development than Allen himself. “Ovieto is a lovely town,” Allen told WENN. “I went there a couple of times and, without asking me, they erected this statue.”
Certainly there’s a reason. Maybe the Ovieto chamber of commerce is hoping to nab some of that sweet Scarlett Johansson tourism dollar. Or maybe it’s a town populated primarily by nebbishy old men, to whom Allen is some sort of demigod. Legend holds that if you rub the tuchus of the Woody Allen statue three times as the parish clock strikes midnight, your wooing of that mousy high schooler will finally bear fruit.
“I never saved someone from drowning,” Allen also added, just throwing it out there. So, you know, don’t expect him to be any help at your next pool party.
The full Shia
Fear not, Shia LeBeouf fans who can’t stomach disfigurement. That Star magazine story earlier this week about the Beef facing pinky amputation after his truck-flipping stunt show? Totally false, man. Or so say his people, calling it a “completely fabricated story.” So, rest easy. Physically at least, Shia will remain a complete person, and won’t have to become the creepy uncle of Young Hollywood.